Outsmart Your Dog

Stop leaving the garbage can within our reach when you have smelly morsels tucked inside. We *WILL* find them and we will stop at nothing to uncover them.

Go outside with us as puppies when you expect us to do our business. Otherwise we *WILL* wait until we come back into the warm house. It's great fun to pretend we are a morphed version of the Easter Bunny and watch you running around acting all loud and animated while you discover our treasures. Especially when you find them by accident...

Hold onto our heads when we have our baths and start to wind up for a good spin cycle doggie style. Dang, I hate to give this one away. We so LOVE to pay back the favor of a bath.

Put the dog collar on correctly before you take us out for our walk. You need to have the collar up under the ears and under the chin. This gives you the control. If you let the collar slip to mid neck or worse... guess who gets control then?... WOOF!

And for heaven's sake... quit babying the dogs who act all pitiful and scared will ya? You're turning them into pansies by doing this. It's as if your approving of their ridiculous behavior and it's giving many of us a bad name! QUIT IT!

We are DOGS, not children. But for the record, similarly to children, we dogs become what you expect of us. Expect great things and you will get great things. Sad it can't go the other way around... we keep thinking great things of you but sadly, most of you just don't seem to live up to our expectations. Lucky for you, we haven't given up on you yet.

Have you been taking notes? Good human!
Now get up there to the top of this article and rate us 5 paws... errr... 5 stars for our unselfish effort to enlighten you all.